Directions

*Pour yourself a glass or four.

*Type ONE ANSWER per comment.

*Write the number, type of word, and your word (i.e. #1 Noun: labia).

*Make it DIRTY.

*Make it CRUDE.

*Make it Twilight-related. (semi-optional)

*Make one of the words “taint." It's a must. The word "taint" is funny ALL THE TIME.

*Oh yeah, I know we'll be a tad bit tipsy, but try to read the other comments,
so we know what number we're on and don't have any repeats.

-Mox

Friday, January 28, 2011

Lettin' It ALL Hang Out!

Welcome, Ladies, to a night of unabashed love for all things DIRTY!!! I even have a little treat for you. It's music to play by! As a warning, the video does contain a few political views that I don't give a FUCK about. I am politically indifferent. I'm Switzerland!

But first, I need to scar you for life by showing you what I think of when I hear "Lettin' It All Hang Out!"  At least this way, you'll think of it too.  I won't be alone in my need for hot boiling acid directly on my retinas.  How is this POSSIBLE???

Her belly button must be so pissed.

I dare you NOT to think of this picture the next time someone says the phrase, "Lettin' It All Hang Out."

Now that I've successfully grossed you out, let's move onto the FUN!  Here it is.  It's an oldy, but goody to some of us h00rish types, but to others it may be brand new. To the n00bs and h00rs, alike, I am honored to present...

Tenacious D!!!





Mad Lib #1
SV's Hint: Eating Out

1. Adjective
2. Adjective
3. Celebrity
4. Adjective
5. Noun
6. Adjective
7. Adjective
8. Noun
9. Noun
10. Type of Food
11. Plural Noun
12. Noun
13. Plural Noun
14. Adjective

Chinese Dinner

I recently had dinner at a new Chinese restaurant.  The cooking was hot pink and the service was fan-friggin-tastic.  The owner of the restaurant, Peter Facinelli, suggested that for my first course I have sweet and flacid spare ribs, which is a specialty of the gut.  They were comatose.  For the next course, I was served a craptastic tennis shoes that convert into fly fishing waders  soup.  The main course consisted of Egg Foo Labia Lip, lobster in bratwurst sauce, and pressed twatwaffles.  For dessert, I ordered those famous Chinese sillystring cookies with sliced cock rockets.  But whenever I eat Chinese food, an hour later I feel putrid again.


Mad Lib #2

SV's Hint:  Speakeasy

1. Adjective
2. Occupation
3. Plural Noun
4. Noun
5. (skip)
6. Adjective
7. Noun
8. Adjective
9. Adjective
10. Adjective
11. Noun
12. Adjective
13. Type of Food
14. Part of the Body
15. Noun
16. Noun
17. Adjective
18. Adjective
19. Noun
20. Noun
21. Plural Noun

Father Goose Rhymes III


Three purple mice,
See how they run!
They all ran after the farmer's sumo wiper,
Who cut off their vaginal warts with a carving french tickler.
Did you ever see such a sight in you life,
As three purple mice?

There was a crooked man, and went a swampy and burning mile.
He found an ass clown against a scabby stile.
He bought an erect cat, which caught a lengthy mouse,
And they all lived together in a little crooked Rob's beanie's asistant.

Sweaty Jack Horner sat in a corner, eating his sushi pie.
He stuck in his taint meat and pulled out a fuzzy peach,
And said, "What a good Rolodex of unimaginable horror am I!"

Old King Cole was a fishy-smelling old soul,
A crazy old soul was he,
He called for his pussy wrinkle, and he called for his seventeen,
And he called for his Twilight painted Converse Allstars three.

161 comments:

Twired Jen said...

Hot Pink

Living with Edward said...

2 fan friggin tastic

Twired Jen said...

OOPS. Hi everyone! #1 Hot Pink. Geeez I'm rude.

Double_dippin said...

hey guys

DD said...

How do I refresh again f -what

Musing Bella said...

3 - Peter Facinelli

Musing Bella said...

@DD - F5

StarlitViolets said...

Welcome ladies!!!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Lmao!!!! I've just been laughing with the song...omg.

Musing Bella said...

Hi everyone!!
@SV - love the song choice. My friend sang this at karaoke for one of our friend's bachelorette party last summer - it was HILARIOUS.

StarlitViolets said...

@Mrs.P & @MB - THANKS! I love it! It popped into my head today and I just had to share. :)

norcaltwitard said...

#10 food bratwurst

DD said...

#6 peeeeenis

TigerlilyRose said...

3 obese

StarlitViolets said...

Wait ladies. We still need a #4.

Musing Bella said...

Everyone's so excited!

norcaltwitard said...

New at this...sorry if I fuck up :)

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

OK...where are we???? LOLOL!

DD said...

wait what # we on??

StarlitViolets said...

It's all good. It's just easier for me to keep track if we go in order. :)

Musing Bella said...

We need a 4, but not a 6 or 10, LOL

TigerlilyRose said...

Go in order chicas!

StarlitViolets said...

We're on:

4. Adjective

StarlitViolets said...

No MB - I'll need them to resend them.

norcaltwitard said...

#4 adj. Flacid

TigerlilyRose said...

mine was supposed to be 4 Obese

StarlitViolets said...

Good one, NC!

StarlitViolets said...

Fuck me gently with a chainsaw!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

#6) comatose

StarlitViolets said...

TLR - can yours be #6 obese

Musing Bella said...

LMAO @SV - right? We'll figure it out.

TigerlilyRose said...

LMAO we are all fucked up already!

5 Gut

Living with Edward said...

I may be slightly confused as to what number we are on. May be.

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

7) craptastic

Musing Bella said...

Don't we still need a 5?

StarlitViolets said...

Now we need #7 Adjective. :)

Musing Bella said...

@MrsP - your word choice is somehow appropriate... LOL

StarlitViolets said...

NM! Fuck! LMAO!!!

norcaltwitard said...

#7adj squishy

Living with Edward said...

8 Tennis shoes that convert into fly fising waders.

Musing Bella said...

OK, IF we need a 5 - here: labia lip

DD said...

I can't refresh..WHY!!!!
#8 jennyjerkface

StarlitViolets said...

LwE - REALLY???!!!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

SV---my craptastic was 7, I think.

TigerlilyRose said...

its all good I just oopsed and forgot to number it right!

StarlitViolets said...

It's all good kids. We're on track now. :)

Musing Bella said...

Sorry TLR - I see your 5 now. :)

Living with Edward said...

@SV: No good? LOL

DD said...

#12 silly string

Musing Bella said...

9 - labia lip

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

9) Charlie horse

norcaltwitard said...

9or 10?

Musing Bella said...

LMAO @ LwE

norcaltwitard said...

#10 food bratwurst

Musing Bella said...

Yay NC!

norcaltwitard said...

#11 pl noun twatwaffles

DD said...

you see..I;m not good at this..*hangs head *

Musing Bella said...

13 - cock rockets

I think DD put in 12 as silly string awhile back (please can we give it to her?)

Twired Jen said...

Sorry guys...this celeb make up artist just called me back about doing my wedding make up!!!!

Twired Jen said...

14. putrid

Musing Bella said...

@TJ - oohhh!! And?

DD said...

what...wait..where are we oh aew we done yet

LCM174EV said...

Hi, I am a tad late huh? damn

#14: Swampy

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

I second silly string for 12

StarlitViolets said...

I'll be right back with the results and the second lib! :)

Musing Bella said...

Yaaaaay!

LCM174EV said...

How do we refresh the comment feed?

Musing Bella said...

F5 to refresh

DD said...

This is hard..especially because I'm drunk, in bed and it's dark..

Twired Jen said...

He's not nearly as expensive as I thought...$200. $95 for consultation though. He has worked on Kendra, Kim K, etc etc etc...Brian Bond. Google him! My neighbor and a few other recommended him highly.

17foreverlisa said...

13 Plural Noun Robz Balls

TheRugbymom said...

Oh shit! I came in late and by the time I read all your comments to catch up, you were done!

DD said...

F5 is not working for me WTF

Musing Bella said...

@DD - that's what she said, LOL

norcaltwitard said...

#14 adj. Hairy

Musing Bella said...

Sorry - about it being hard, not F5.. I don't know why that doesn't work!

Musing Bella said...

Baahahahaha at the first one. I made fried rice and chicken for dinner. It was quite flaccid, if I do say so myself.

Musing Bella said...

OK -

1 - purple

TigerlilyRose said...

1 adjective wiggly

TheRugbymom said...

what's a skip? (#5)

TheRugbymom said...

2 sumo wiper

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Love the craptastic tennis shoes!!!!!! LMAO!
I can't stick around for the second one...have fun ladies!

Musing Bella said...

Bye Mrs P!

StarlitViolets said...

The skip is a repeat of #1. So just skip it. :)

TigerlilyRose said...

2 Porn Studio Cleaning Lady

LCM174EV said...

4. french tickler

Living with Edward said...

I thought number 5 meant that we were all supposed to take a moment to skip. Like the verb skip. Physically active Mad Libs seems like a really good idea.

Musing Bella said...

3 - vaginal warts

LCM174EV said...

oops missed 3, my refesh is so slow I assumed someone else had gotten to it! Sorry

Living with Edward said...

We're on 5! Everybody skip!

TigerlilyRose said...

WTF did everyone go!

Need number 3

boobies

TheRugbymom said...

@Musing Bella Ewww!

StarlitViolets said...

I made TLR's #3. So now we're on #5.

LCM174V said...

6. swampy

TigerlilyRose said...

LMAO MB vag warts...ewwww

StarlitViolets said...

TLR - I had to give #3 to MB. It was too good to pass up.

TigerlilyRose said...

6 burning

Musing Bella said...

We can't be on #5, SV, we're supposed to skip it. ;)

Musing Bella said...

Hahhahaha - can we please have BOTH swampy AND burning????

TigerlilyRose said...

I was just about to tell you to use MBs!

Musing Bella said...

I think this is the first time in the history of ever that anyone was wanting vaginal warts. ;)

Living with Edward said...

Oh no, swampy burnig vag warts. That can't be good. Especially if your letting it all hang out.

TigerlilyRose said...

7 assclown

StarlitViolets said...

As in #5 swampy and burning???

TheRugbymom said...

7 smokin'

LCM174EV said...

8. scabby

TheRugbymom said...

I meant #8 smokin'

Musing Bella said...

As in whatever you want, bb - I just think that's hilarious. You could put a comma in between, if it works better.

norcaltwitard said...

#9 adj erect

Musing Bella said...

10 - lengthy

Living with Edward said...

11, Rob's beanie's assistant

TigerlilyRose said...

11 pregnant cow

LCM174EV said...

11. package

Living with Edward said...

@TLR: I see you are looking forward to Breaking Dawn.

norcaltwitard said...

#12 food sushi

Musing Bella said...

PMSL @ LwE!!!

TheRugbymom said...

13 taint meat

TigerlilyRose said...

12 purple

Living with Edward said...

@TheRugbymom: Taint meat? LOLOLOL

Musing Bella said...

@RugbyMom - ewwwwwwwww

StarlitViolets said...

MB - yours is #14 instead, k?

TigerlilyRose said...

14 chocolate starfish

Musing Bella said...

SV - sure thing. I don't even remember what one you're talking about. :) LOL - LwE is cracking my shit up and I can't keep it together.

StarlitViolets said...

I do still need a #12 Adj. Then we're on to 15.

TigerlilyRose said...

there are two 12's already...LOL

TheRugbymom said...

@TLR said purple for #12

Musing Bella said...

Wait, what body art did I submit? I'm so confused. How can mine be 14?

TigerlilyRose said...

15 fuzzy peachy

Living with Edward said...

16. Rolodex of unimmaginable horror.

Musing Bella said...

15 - booger

lcm174ev said...

16. scrotum

TheRugbymom said...

my glass is empty BRB

Musing Bella said...

Oops.

Um - 16 - booger

Musing Bella said...

Crap!

Living with Edward said...

@MB: LOL

Musing Bella said...

17 - fishy-smelling

Dangrdafne said...

17. crazy

StarlitViolets said...

LOL! At your 17!

Living with Edward said...

DD!!!

StarlitViolets said...

DD!!!

TigerlilyRose said...

17 sticky

StarlitViolets said...

JINX!!!

Musing Bella said...

DD!!!

I wanted to be part of the in-crowd.

Living with Edward said...

@SV: Stop copying me!

StarlitViolets said...

I've had TONS of 17s - we need an 18.

Musing Bella said...

Look at all the 17s! Do we like that # or something?

Living with Edward said...

Ooo, I'm a trend setter!

Dangrdafne said...

18. crazy

Living with Edward said...

I think DD is trying to tell us something.

TigerlilyRose said...

k girls my back is killing me, gonna bail for a bit and take some vicodin!

Musing Bella said...

Yay DD!

19 - pussywrinkle

Musing Bella said...

LMAO @ LwE yet again...

TheRugbymom said...

20 seventeen

Living with Edward said...

21 Twilight painted converse allstars

Musing Bella said...

We did it!!!!!!!! *high fives all around*

StarlitViolets said...

Okay - I'll let you all know when I'm done!

Thanks so much for playing!

TheRugbymom said...

Imma go back to reading Click & Strum by Bratty Vamp

Living with Edward said...

That doesn't sound like a story it sounds like a masterbation technique.

TheRugbymom said...

@LwE you just gave me a great idea!

Musing Bella said...

LMAO! Cut off their vaginal warts with a carving french tickler! Hahaha - blargh.

TigerlilyRose said...

BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!