Directions

*Pour yourself a glass or four.

*Type ONE ANSWER per comment.

*Write the number, type of word, and your word (i.e. #1 Noun: labia).

*Make it DIRTY.

*Make it CRUDE.

*Make it Twilight-related. (semi-optional)

*Make one of the words “taint." It's a must. The word "taint" is funny ALL THE TIME.

*Oh yeah, I know we'll be a tad bit tipsy, but try to read the other comments,
so we know what number we're on and don't have any repeats.

-Mox

Friday, January 14, 2011

Visual Verbage

We've all be drooling over the new picture of Edward and Bella in a post (or perhaps pre) coital embrace from Breaking Dawn, but check out what Cullen Boys Anonymous posted today.....


HELLO!!!!

Feel free to use this photo to inspire the dirtiest of the dirty verbs, adjectives and nouns.

MAD LIB #1
  1. Plural noun
  2. Plural noun
  3. Type of liquid
  4. Type of container
  5. Verb
  6. Noun
  7. Article of clothing (plural)
  8. Foreign Country
  9. Plural Noun
  10. Occupation
  11. Plural Noun
  12. Plural Noun
  13. Celebrity (male)
  14. Adjective
  15. Verb
The Sophisticate

He prefers reading used condoms to playing bung holes.  He'd rather drink sweat than anything else, and only out of tupperware.  He loves the touch of silk and will suck at the sight of a well-made tainted love. He is extremely particular about folding his Pattinson panties in something resembling origami.  He speaks the native tongue of Curacco, all the better to procure rare pisses.  He tried his hand at being a cabana boy but decided it was beneath him.  Instead, he spends his day in pursuit of nipples and anal beads.  Of course, he's as poor as Robert Pattinson was in his slippery days.  If only he had the means to lick in the style to which he's become accustomed!

MAD LIB #2
  1. Celebrity (female)
  2. Type of liquid
  3. Part of the body
  4. Celebrity (male)
  5. Noun
  6. Noun
  7. Number
  8. Type of Liquid
  9. Plural Noun
  10. Number
  11. Type of event
  12. Type of sport
  13. Noun
  14. Occupation
The Metrosexual

While he professes to love Betty White, the pieces don't add up.  Check the following list to see if your man is a little too into himself.
  • Uses lots of spunk in his hair before going out
  • Suspect he waxes his vajayjay
  • Starts grooving when he hears Kellan Lutz
  • Knows the difference between his Isle Esme and his taint
  • Showers 50 times a day and his been known to take a bath in sperm
  • Owns more than ten pairs of twitchy palms
  • Can tie his necktie 17 ways
  • Attends The Chicken Farming Expo instead of scissor fighting
  • Buys his vicodin based on its color, not its performance
  • Secretly wants to be a hair proctologist.

193 comments:

fanficzombie said...

used condoms #1

fanficzombie said...

ohh popped my #1 cherry...cuz no one is here

mmMoxie said...

LOL nice work FFZ. You might get 1-15 if no one else shows up.

TigerlilyRose said...

#2 Pl noun bung holes

fanficzombie said...

they are coming...they are just taking their sweet old time...coming in at the 11th hour and shit

mmMoxie said...

I think they may be distracted by the photo I posted. It's delicious!

mmMoxie said...

Hiya TLR!

fanficzombie said...

dang...too bad I already said used condoms LOL!!!! (#4)

TigerlilyRose said...

it is delicious Mox!

I_heart_Fifty / TwiKiwi said...

Sorry this laptop is an arsehole. I'm here! Hi everyone

Double_Dippin said...

Hey chicas

fanficzombie said...

photo???BRB

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

Hey y'all!

Dangrdafne said...

3. Sweat

mmMoxie said...

Hello ladies!

RobzSinger said...

how do you refresh again.

word up everyone!

I_heart_Fifty / TwiKiwi said...

4. Tupperware

fanficzombie said...

Oh hellz mox!! That is hawt!!! You don't show up much..but when you do...DAYUM!!!

TigerlilyRose said...

4. vajayjay

RobzSinger said...

#6 tainted love

Double_Dippin said...

#6 Robert Pattinson

17foreverlisa said...

OH. MY. GOD.

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

6. Ballsack

TigerlilyRose said...

IHF--LMAO I was just typing tupperware and changed gears....Too funny!

fanficzombie said...

ROBZINGER Hit F5

17foreverlisa said...

OH. MY. GOD.

Doublle_Dippin said...

#8 curacco

mmMoxie said...

we need #5 verb

I_heart_Fifty / TwiKiwi said...

I'm sorry this really isn't working for me, trouble refreshing.... gonna try sort it out...

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

5. sucking

mmMoxie said...

Need #7

Dangrdafne said...

7. Pattinson Panties

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

7. Knickers

TigerlilyRose said...

what happened to #5? #5 Suckling

Double_Dippin said...

#10 Cabana boy

17foreverlisa said...

OH. MY. GOD.

Mandy's Mind said...

I made it I made it weeeeee... Hello!

fanficzombie said...

#7 jock straps

mmMoxie said...

btw: I reserve the right to adjust the tense if needed.

Mandy's Mind said...

foreign country #8 - CANADA?!?!?

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

10. hooker

TigerlilyRose said...

holy hell what is with the jumping around...LOL

#8 Italy

Dangrdafne said...

8. Russia

RobzSinger said...

lisa...is it F5 on a mac?

i'll figure it out by the time we're done:)

#5 dry humping

mmMoxie said...

um. DD I'm going to have to hurt you if you keep going out of order! Just kidding (not really)

fanficzombie said...

wow-- disfunction on a grand scale...way to go DML!!! WOOOOTTTTT

I_heart_Fifty / TwiKiwi said...

Umm, hello.... 8 NEEDS to be New Zealand.

Mandy's Mind said...

HOw is everyone ;) CHEERS *slurp*

mmMoxie said...

we need #9

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

9. pisses

17foreverlisa said...

Yes, it's F5 on the Mac.

RobzSinger said...

i'm crampin everyone's style. gonna bow out til i figure this shit out...

TigerlilyRose said...

#11 nipples

I_heart_Fifty / TwiKiwi said...

Ohkay so I'm using a crusty loan laptop and it's taking a dump right when I want to comment, so imma mostly be a DML lurker this afternoon laidees....

Double_Dippin said...

Im sorry I'm not good at this game I don't know how to refresh it..:(

mmMoxie said...

to refresh on a Mac I hit the button next to CTRL (I don't know what it is) and "R"

TigerlilyRose said...

you are fine RZ...no probs!

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

Damn. I'm confused. what # are we on?

17foreverlisa said...

#10 baby mama

fanficzombie said...

After several suspect sober DML's -- it is nice to see everyone staggering around tonight (hic)

mmMoxie said...

we're on #12

TigerlilyRose said...

ready for #12

Dangrdafne said...

the 'fn' key or function key and the F5 key on the Mac OR you can press the Apple key and the R key on a Mac

17foreverlisa said...

Oh for crying out loud. You'd think this was the first time I've played DML. Must be because I'm sober.

No idea what number we're on. Can't stop staring at that picture.

mmMoxie said...

@FFZ - I'm telling you, it's the hot ass pic of Rob. Throwing all of us off our game.

fanficzombie said...

#10 CUM guzzler

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

Come back RS!!!

mmMoxie said...

@Lisa - I think it's because DML is punishing me for never being here.

we're on #12

fanficzombie said...

@mox...umm...did you say something??/ DROOOOOLLLLL....

TigerlilyRose said...

FFZ No drunk tonight...though I am on coffee and Vicoden...LOL

17foreverlisa said...

RS, the F5 key refreshes on my Mac keyboard just fine, but try with DD said.

RobzSinger said...

i wish i could say i was drunk but it's just ditzy me;)

#13 ROBERT PATTINSON

I_heart_Fifty / TwiKiwi said...

Lisa - I'm sober every time we do this; trust me, it's like watching a train wreck sometimes!

#13 TomStu

Mandy's Mind said...

If we choose anyone but RObert Pattinson for for 13 do we get perma-banned from DML?

fanficzombie said...

#12 anal beads

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

Shit. I can't keep up. I need another drinky-poo.

mmMoxie said...

#12 #12 #12

TigerlilyRose said...

still need 12

mmMoxie said...

Sheesh, thanks FFZ

Double_Dippin said...

#10 benwaa balls

Mandy's Mind said...

cuz I'd say Channing Tatum - rawr!

fanficzombie said...

#14 slippery

mmMoxie said...

#14

Living with Edward said...

I'm here I'm here!

17foreverlisa said...

#15 lick

DD said...

woops imeant #12 Benwaa balls drunk is not good

TigerlilyRose said...

WTF are you drinking Dbl dippin? ROFL....

Mandy's Mind said...

#15 - lick

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

12. drinks

Living with Edward said...

15, Face punch

mmMoxie said...

Listening to Danzig is making me testy....

Ok. I'm going to post finished ML 1

Do we want to do a #2?

Mandy's Mind said...

17FL - great minds ;)

17foreverlisa said...

Hey, LwE! You're late. You were supposed to be hosting weren't you?

fanficzombie said...

Well...I think...if you toss it all up...we actually got them all

Mandy's Mind said...

what's everyone drinkin?

DD said...

Holy Fuck I'm so confused...

TigerlilyRose said...

Maybe we should try another mox...so we might get the hang of it...LMAO

RobzSinger said...

command + R
that's it!

wait, hello? damn.

fanficzombie said...

MOX DANZIG... You are a girl after my own heart

Living with Edward said...

Lisa! Don't do that to me!! LOL Edward was all worried we were going to have to do some type of strange emergency photo shoot.

mmMoxie said...

Ok TLR - ML 2 coming right up

fanficzombie said...

@Mandys Mind.... TUACA!!!!

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

@RS: bwhahahahahaa. I'm havin a PBR 4 U, hon.

DD said...

Screweddriver..Yup I said screwed..

DD said...

Screweddriver..Yup I said screwed..

Mandy's Mind said...

@fanficzombie say what?

fanficzombie said...

Yeah!!! Do a #2...we can do worse..I know we can!!!

I_heart_Fifty / TwiKiwi said...

Buahahahahaha.... that is all.

Mandy's Mind said...

@DD nice

RobzSinger said...

Hi Mrs.The Slut. Have 2 please:)

17foreverlisa said...

Did some kidnap the real DD? Because the one playing DML just said Holy Fuck.

fanficzombie said...

Tuaca...google it... citrus vanilla brandy style drink...best on the rocks straight or watered down a bit...a girly grown up drink IMO

DD said...

Oh control + R yeah that works thanks

Jen (P.E.'s Ho) said...

You got it whip cracker :)

Living with Edward said...

We have 2 DD's now. Holy moly, they are multiplying. I have absolutely no problem with this!

TigerlilyRose said...

Tuaca! ummmm....I need to look for that again!

Dangrdafne said...

That DD is not me - I believe it is the alter ego for Double Dippin

Mandy's Mind said...

@fanficzombie yum - I have a full bar at my house (duty free = cheap booze) i should grab some of that next time sounds delish

TheRugbymom said...

wow! you ladies are too fast tonight!

17foreverlisa said...

Please give Edward my sincere apologizes, LwE.

Two DD's? Is Dangrdafne not playing tonight?

DD, are you Double Dippin'?

DD said...

Lisa can't I say Holy Fuck?? I usually say HOLY HELL..but this fuck was called for ps. I'm toolazy to write Double_Dippin dd for short

17foreverlisa said...

Mandy, I see we picked the same word for #15. Mine was only about an hour later, but what the hey.

Mandy's Mind said...

@17foreverlisa ha great minds think alike ;) or dirty minds at least LOL

mmMoxie said...

Ready for ML #2???

Dangrdafne said...

Apparently I am invisible to Lisa tonite. I did some words, I wrote about the refresh key and I just sent you an email *waves* can you see me????

TheRugbymom said...

#1 Betty Whiter

Mandy's Mind said...

I skipped out on going out tonight because I am too damn tired from work this week and wanted to drink at home... then I remembered DML woot woot

dd said...

ok Dangrdafne you go caps I'll go lower case

17foreverlisa said...

You are totally allowed, and encouraged, to cuss here. It's just that I don't think I've ever heard Dangrdafne (aka DD) do it and I was confuscious.

TheRugbymom said...

I meant Betty White!

mmMoxie said...

Is Betty Whiter better than Betty White?

TigerlilyRose said...

#2 Spunk

17foreverlisa said...

Oh my hell. I swear to God that picture Mox posted has fried what is left of my brain, DD...er...Dangrdafne.

Mandy's Mind said...

LOL @ #1

Mandy's Mind said...

#3 - vajayjay

mmMoxie said...

LMAO I know right Lisa??? It is so freaking HOT!

Mandy's Mind said...

slow refresh gah

TigerlilyRose said...

#4 Kellan Lutz

mmMoxie said...

we're on #4 of DML2

Mandy's Mind said...

#5 (or #6) Isle of Esme

TheRugbymom said...

#5 the obligatory TAINT

mmMoxie said...

OK Mandy. We'll use it for #5

need #6 now

dd said...

#6 beer can

17foreverlisa said...

Is Betty Whiter better than Betty White? LMAFO!!

Mandy, good call.

Mox, I think I'm going to have to put it up on my blog sidebar. It's that pretty. Think he's looking down at Kinko? PMSL!

mmMoxie said...

Rugbymom -we'll use Taint for #6

Anyone have #7?

TigerlilyRose said...

so are we on #7 now...

#7 50

dd said...

#7 69 of course

TigerlilyRose said...

you are welcum Fifty lovers

17foreverlisa said...

Mox, folding his Pattinson panties in something resembling origami is classic!

mmMoxie said...

ROFL Lisa!!!! Kinko knows how to please.

Mandy's Mind said...

another liquid man I am curious to see where THIS one goes...

dd said...

#8 sperm

mmMoxie said...

LOL DD - simply put "sperm"

TheRugbymom said...

9 twitchy palms

mmMoxie said...

need #9

dd said...

#9 fluffers

mmMoxie said...

now #10

17foreverlisa said...

Ka-ching, Lacey!!!

Mox, have you started writing that ff yet? LOL!

mmMoxie said...

did we lose everyone?

17foreverlisa said...

#10 17!!!!

mmMoxie said...

@Lisa - That would be a wicked HOT FF wouldn't it?

TigerlilyRose said...

still here, just letting others go!

Living with Edward said...

11 Chicken farming expo

dd said...

#11 orgy

mmMoxie said...

we need #11

TigerlilyRose said...

#11 Scissor Fight

fanficzombie said...

DUDE!! Did you do a twitter post announcing start of #2???? WTF??

TigerlilyRose said...

#12 Scissor fighting

mmMoxie said...

sorry FFZ - I didn't know I was supposed to announce the start of 2

dd said...

#12 mixed martial arts

TigerlilyRose said...

got #13 FFZ?

mmMoxie said...

yup, need #13 and #14. Moxie needs a smoke!

17foreverlisa said...

Definitely wicked, Mox ;)

Man this is one clusterfuck tonight. Shocker, I know.

I thought Jaymes and Demanda were going to play tonight.

Mrs. P's daughter has been sick, and she had a craptastic day, so she didn't think she'd be here tonight.

I_heart_Fifty / TwiKiwi said...

TLR - thanks for the Fifty lurve!

Sincerely,
Lurky McLurkerson

p.s. #12 Jelly wrestling

TheRugbymom said...

13 cock gobbler

fanficzombie said...

#13 vicodin

dd said...

14 proctologist

17foreverlisa said...

#13 Jackson Rathbone

fanficzombie said...

#14 professional blogger

mmMoxie said...

Sweet. I"m going to post this then ANNOUNCE the posting on Twitter.

Living with Edward said...

14 Rob's beanie carrier.

TigerlilyRose said...

PMSL FFZ...i love Vicodin!

17foreverlisa said...

Noooooooooo! I did it again. LMFAO! I had scrolled up to look at the picture again and did #13 for DML #1.

dd said...

OMG...I'm am sooo not good at this..sorry guys

fanficzombie said...

crap....always a bridesmade....

@ Mandy...YES... get some Tuaca for your bar...you will thank me later.. YUMMY

TheRugbymom said...

@dd - that's what makes it so much fun!

Mandy's Mind said...

greaqt fun ladies despite the delays and such - i am gonna go pur another drink and check back for the full write up later xoxo see some of you on twitter - same name xo

TheRugbymom said...

@fanficzombie - how about a vicodin Tuaca cocktail !

17foreverlisa said...

dd, I have been playing this since day one and I still stuck at it. Don't apologize. That's half the charm. LOL!

Ok, kidz. Son just got home from work. Going to visit with him a little bit. Catch some/most of you on twitter.

mmMoxie said...

It was painful.....but finished.

TigerlilyRose said...

ROFL...those are both great! thanks for hosting this week Mox!!!

fanficzombie said...

@rubymom Now that is a COCKtail

17foreverlisa said...

Ha! Starts grooving when he hears Kellan Lutz.

Thanks, Mox. Sorry it was painful ;)