Directions

*Pour yourself a glass or four.

*Type ONE ANSWER per comment.

*Write the number, type of word, and your word (i.e. #1 Noun: labia).

*Make it DIRTY.

*Make it CRUDE.

*Make it Twilight-related. (semi-optional)

*Make one of the words “taint." It's a must. The word "taint" is funny ALL THE TIME.

*Oh yeah, I know we'll be a tad bit tipsy, but try to read the other comments,
so we know what number we're on and don't have any repeats.

-Mox

Friday, March 4, 2011

Borderline Phenomenally Drunk and Mad Libbin

Good evening Drunk Mad Libbers!  Allow us to introduce ourselves. We are Demanda and Jaymes visiting from Borderline Phenomenal and are muy excited to be hosting this evening. So get your drinks ready (execpt for you Myaftercar, you just drink juice or something) and put your dirty thinking caps on because "IT'S TIME!"


As most of you are sick of hearing know, we took a little trip a few weeks ago to L.A. to see/meet 100 Monkeys.  This trip was amazaballs. Not only did we get to see a freaking awesome band and some hot pieces of arse...

Borderline Phenomenal and 100 Monkeys unite!


but we also got to hang out with our lovely twi-besties.

LuvsMeSumEdward wasn't there yet but she was in spririt. 

One thing that would have made this experience even more awesome was if all of you were able to come along with us. So we figured, why not rewrite history and include all of you in the fun. So without further ado, we present to you:

A Borderline Phenomenal DML Trip!


1.    Adjective
2.    Noun
3.    Noun plural
4.    Insulting term
5.    Body part plural
6.    Verb
7.    Adjective
8.    Verb past tense
9.    Verb past tense
10.  Adjective
11.  Noun
12.  Noun
13.  Adjective
14.  Verb past tense
15.  Adjective
16.  Noun
17.  Place
18.  Bodily function
19.  Adjective
20.  Noun
21.  Adjective
22.  Body part (female)
23.  Adverb
24.  Celebrity
25.  Adjective
26.  Adjective
27.  Insulting term
28.  Article of Clothing
29.  Food item
30.  Noun
31.  Adjective
32.  Adjective
33.  Ajective
34.  Body Part
35.  Adjective
36.  Adjective
37.  Verb
38.  Name of food/drink'
39.  Emotion/feeling
40.  Verb ending in ing
41.  Noun plural
42.  Verb ending in ing
43.  Noun plural
44.  Adjective
45.  Adjective
46.  Emotion
47.  Adverb
48.  Noun plural
49.  Verb
50.  Twilight character
51.  Twilight character


Last weekend, the bulging Jaymes and Demanda took a trip to L.A. to see 100 Monkeys. They got up at the meat wallet of dawn to drive three hours to Los Angeles. On the way down there, Demanda and Jaymes decided to rock out to some Bieber. Most monkeys think Bieber is a TwiMom but they love to rock out with their foreskins out to his music.

“I just need somebody to PORK!!!! ”, Demanda sang out at the top of her lungs.  All of the sudden she stopped and said “I have to go to the bathroom so clammy. Let’s stop somewhere.”  They finally found a CVS, bedazzled out of the car and boinked into the store. As soon as they got near the bathroom, they realized this place was a sticky chode.  “This place smells like Amanda’s crotch!!” Demanda screamed out loud and Jaymes gave her a flaming hot look.  They cried and licked at the sight and smells of this place. It was like someone took all of the sticky moose knuckles in the The Roxy and combined them into this one room to use as a torture chamber.  Someone had also pooped on the toilet paper roll which made the situation even more sparkly.

The girls got out of that place as fast as a cum dumpster and continued on their journey. They finally arrived in the squeaky land of Beverly Hills. Demanda had an appointment to get her clit waxed and Jaymes waited vigorously while scanning the area for famous people. She really was hoping to see Jackson Rathbone but sadly, that didn’t happen. She still had just as much fun watching bloated people.

Soon enough, it was night time and the girls were heading to The Roxy to meet the pulsating 100 Monkeys.  After a long drive down Sunset Blvd.,  they finally arrived at The Roxy and met some cum guzzling son of a bitch fans.  Jaymes was nervously shaking in her ripped panties but played it cool as a cucumber when she met the band. Jackson was looking as handsome as a robot timberwolf  in his salty pants, with his fishy crooked smile. Demanda wanted to yell “Jaaaaaaasper” really tight at the top of her ass cheeks but decided against it. Although they do love him in Twilight, it was nice to see him without that elongated wig and freeway look on his face.  When he put his hand on Jaymes' lower back, she got flushed and immediately wanted to shat.

After meeting the band, getting autographs and taking pictures, the girls went next door to get some catfish.  They finished and were feeling very fucked so they went back to The Roxy to meet up with all of their DML friends for the show.  All of the h00rs had an amazing time, groping alligators and fucking leg hitches. The bands were all explosive and 100 Monkeys were even more cranky live. All in all everything about the weekend made the girls giddy and they can’t wait to do it again someday soon.  

    The End.

    PS- The next day, there was a rumor going around that Rob and Kristen were porntastically at a grocery store in Sherman Oaks.  Most likely they were buying blood pumping muscles to go fisting for their naughty role playing game as Edward (Fifty) and Jasper.

    Thanks for playing this Borderline Phenomenal edition of DML. Come visit us over BORDERLINE PHENOMENAL and Jayme's BRAND NEW Jackson blog RATHGASM 101!

241 comments:

1 – 200 of 241   Newer›   Newest»
Jaymes805 said...

WELCOME H00000RS.

SOME RULES:

BE DIRTY.

THATS ALL.

Twired Jen said...

Hellllo! Ladies, this DML rocks cocks already. LOVE the idea. Pssst, I love how that pic makes me look uber tan...if only I was :)

Twired Jen said...

Oh and see my avi, that's pretty much me right about now.

VampiresWeLove said...

Howdy Hoors :)

Jaymes805 said...

Haha I heart photo editing websites for that reason!

Jaymes805 said...

Helllooo Vampswelove <---shortened it.

VampiresWeLove said...

aww-where's the one with you kissing Edward? Me Likey ;)

Jaymes805 said...

Jen your avi always makes me want to drink. My avi makes me want to go back to Cbad.

VampiresWeLove said...

VWL way shorter LOL

Living with Edward said...

51 words?! Even I'm not that presumptuious!

fanficzombie said...

holy cow...you weren't kidding...that is a Loooonnnggg DML!!

My After Car Is An XKR said...

Hellooooo all!

Twired Jen said...

Eh I'll just keep that for twitter...too lazy to change blogger. Is it rude of me to start?
1. Bulging (as in Jackson's package was bulging...)

fanficzombie said...

#1 looonnggg

Jaymes805 said...

Shush! It's my guest hosting so I had to make it long, who knows if i'll ever get the chance again haha. We might f it up royally this one time. Had to make it count.

VampiresWeLove said...

#2 Meat Wallet

Jaymes805 said...

Lol it was bulging, that thing is outta control

Twired Jen said...

Roll Call: Lisa, Margaret, SV, Amanda...where are my girls?

Jaymes805 said...

Manda is here but wandering the kitchen

Twired Jen said...

3. Monkeys

VampiresWeLove said...

#4 TwiMom

Living with Edward said...

4. douche waddle

Living with Edward said...

LOL twimom

Twired Jen said...

VWL LOL!!!

TheRugbymom said...

Hola! We like it looooong! And thick! Yes, we do!

Twired Jen said...

5. foreskins

Jaymes805 said...

haha this is awesome already.

fanficzombie said...

#5 hairy balls

My After Car Is An XKR said...

Oh jeez I'm already behind. And I don't even have the excuse of being drunk.

Can I use Angry Edward as an excuse? I just kept rewinding the DVD where he says "well let me give you a clue." Angry = hooooo-ooooot.

VampiresWeLove said...

#6 Pork (not the other other white meat)

My After Car Is An XKR said...

*shivers* I just watched it again. YUMMY.

fanficzombie said...

#7 clammy

fanficzombie said...

that was for you @james805

VampiresWeLove said...

#8 Bedazzled

Twired Jen said...

If you see a number has already been done, you skip to the next...right? I always forget this part...

darcydalesio said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
fanficzombie said...

#8 tugged

Jaymes805 said...

Yummy angryward!

Demanda said...

Dammit I'm laaaaaaaaate

My After Car Is An XKR said...

9 boinked

TheRugbymom said...

9 ejaculated

Jaymes805 said...

Lol yes it should skip to the next. if its the same right?

VampiresWeLove said...

so #9 could be Tugged ;)

My After Car Is An XKR said...

@Demanda Heeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyy! *hugs*

Smitten said...

Geez, I can see it already... Ain't no way my tipsy ass is gonna be able to keep up! ;)

Oh well, I'm just along for the fun.

Twired Jen said...

10. sticky

Demanda said...

HIIIII love bug!! (hugs you back)

VampiresWeLove said...

11. Chode

TheRugbymom said...

12 taint

Jaymes805 said...

haha yes 9 is tugged. :)

Twired Jen said...

12. Amanda's crotch

Jaymes805 said...

I love wiiiiine (I almost just wrote "I love Taint!" because I just read the word haha)

fanficzombie said...

#13 flaming hot

VampiresWeLove said...

lol we had a big 'ol Taint conversation at work..only like 2 other people knew what it was!!

blue_darcy77 said...

#14 licked

Twired Jen said...

14. sharted

17foreverlisa said...

I AM SO GOING TO JUNK PUNCH MY SATELLITE INTERNET SERVICE! IT'S CRAWLING.

Will try and keep up.

Hello h00rs!

Living with Edward said...

FYI- I may fall asleep. My body is being quite rebellous.

Twired Jen said...

Welcome Blue_darcy!

VampiresWeLove said...

Hey Lisa :)

Twired Jen said...

Lisa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 X 17

Jaymes805 said...

Noooooo sleeping!!!! Haha we use to call "taint" an inbetooter. Like you have the cooter, the pooter and the inbetooter.

Demanda said...

HAHAH Jenn!!! <3 ;)

fanficzombie said...

@jen...I almost had to ask what the hell sharted means...almost..not that drunk yet

TheRugbymom said...

LMAO! inbetooter!

Demanda said...

LOL inbetooter!!!

Jaymes805 said...

Hahah yeaaah inbetooter. Manda and I used to be weird.

fanficzombie said...

#15 sticky

TheRugbymom said...

Used to be???

15 dripping

VampiresWeLove said...

#16 Moose Knuckle

17foreverlisa said...

I love you x17, Jen :)

Jamie and Amanda, thanks for guest hosting!

Hi VWL!

XKR, how are you and baby doing? Good week?

LwE, tired? Long day/week/both?

Demanda said...

Dammit... we still are ;)

Twired Jen said...

16. arm pits

fanficzombie said...

is it weird that for some reason inbetooter sounds like a musical instrument to me?? like a cheesy flutaphone or something...oh god..cheesy...oh ewwww

VampiresWeLove said...

Comic-Con!!! Whoop Whoop...got the magazine today :)

Twired Jen said...

17. The Roxy

Jaymes805 said...

Hi Lisaaaa! Thanks for letting us guest host! :)

TheRugbymom said...

17 The Escala

Demanda said...

Lisa- You are so very welcome!!! Sorry I was lllaaaate. My jog took too long

Twired Jen said...

Speaking of...ladies (cough jaymes/amanda/vwl cough) 100 Monkeys Mary 21st tix go on sale in the AM...remember!

Twired Jen said...

I meant May not mary.

TheRugbymom said...

Ha! Ha! Cheesy! Ew!

VampiresWeLove said...

ok-I was going to ask..I kinda skipped over the "on sale" date..oopie

Twired Jen said...

18. Poop!!!!

Demanda said...

Ohhh yay!!! I will be up early too!

Jaymes805 said...

I will be up bright and early to buy tix! :)

Demanda said...

HA Jeeeennnn.... LOL!!

Living with Edward said...

Lisa, yeah, very long. Not getting any better soon either. Bank conversion mixed with ridiculous sales goals at the same time SUUUUUCCCCKKKSSS. Can't wait for it to be over in month and a half.

17foreverlisa said...

Love #17 TRM!!! Yay :)

I didn't even know you were late Amanda since I was so damn late. LOL!

#18 pee

Smitten said...

OMFG Jen, LMFAO@ #12 Amanda's Crotch.

TheRugbymom said...

@LwE Oh! Is the bank having a sale on money?

Jaymes805 said...

Haha amanda's crotch didnt make it in there. buuut if every one thinks it should than it shall be!

Jaymes805 said...

HAHAHAHA "IS THE BANK HAVING A SALE ON MONEY?" BEST EVER!!!!!!!

TwiKiwi50 said...

Hi honey I'm home!

My After Car Is An XKR said...

@Lisa - hey! We're good, lots of kicking going on :) How was your week?

My After Car Is An XKR said...

@TwiKiwi - HEY!!

Amanda's crotch must stay in there. It's freaking awesome.

Jaymes805 said...

Hi Amy!!!!

17foreverlisa said...

I'll bet LwE. I didn't realize you were going through a bank conversion. Everything secure with your job?

My After Car Is An XKR said...

That sounded wrong. You know what I meant.

Demanda said...

My crotch for the win!!!

VampiresWeLove said...

wrong in all the right ways...

TwiKiwi50 said...

What's happenin h00rs? I need some hard liquor after the day I've had. And it's only 3.56pm. Cos that's how I roll.

Twired Jen said...

19. sparkly

fanficzombie said...

Hi Twikiwi!!!!
Hi Lisa!!

VampiresWeLove said...

20 Cum Dumpster

fanficzombie said...

@Twikiwi...it is 5 oclock somewhere futuregirl!!

fanficzombie said...

#21 squeeky

Demanda said...

You ladies are cracking me up!!!

Twired Jen said...

22. Clit

VampiresWeLove said...

#22 Earlobe lol

Living with Edward said...

TheRugbymom; No, cause that would be a good idea and they don't have any of those.

@Lisa: Job is secure but it's just a pain in the ass. So much going on all. the. time. There is a day next week that I have to stay until about midnight. Real fun times.

TwiKiwi50 said...

Hi FFZ! It's Saturday so who gives a shit about 5 oclock!

22. Tunnel

17foreverlisa said...

XKR: Awwwwwww! Cherish every moment. Long, hectic week but life is good. Can't complain.

FFZ and Amy: Hello!

I swear I'm not going to be able to get a word in unless I cheat and skip ahead with this slow connection :(

VampiresWeLove said...

23..would Fuckery be an Adverb? or a Noun?

fanficzombie said...

omh!! I need to fill my drink and go see if my smoke is charged!!

Jaymes805 said...

HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHA THIS STORY IS SO AWESOME!! Poor Amanda's crotch!!

Twired Jen said...

23. vigorously (did I spell that right?)

Jaymes805 said...

Hmmmm fuckery isn't workin. that might be a noun

Demanda said...

Lisa I'm COUNTING on you for #50 or 51 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TwiKiwi50 said...

Fuck. Every time I play this I can't remember how the hell I got a 90% in English. Can't even remember what a freaking adverb is. *runs to check list on DML homepage*

PS... Hi. To anyone I don't know, I"m Amy, nice to meet you x

Smitten said...

This is fun. I don't plan on actually playing, I'm not functioning quickly enough for that, but you h00rs make me happy!

Don't mind me, I get very lovey when I'm drunk.

Shit, that's the last of the wine... what else do I have...

Jaymes805 said...

Lisa, cheat and give me a word ahead of time. Special "i let you guest host" rules. :)

VampiresWeLove said...

#24-duh, no brainer...I will cunt punch anyone who says Charlie Sheen :P

Twired Jen said...

I am really multi-tasking tonight..DML/Twitter convos/drinking wine

blue_darcy77 said...

Jackson

TwiKiwi50 said...

#24 I think we need a shoutout to JACKSON RATHBONE in honour of Jaymes & Demanda

Twired Jen said...

24. David Hasselhoff

Jaymes805 said...

Jess was supposed to say Renesmo for 23!

17foreverlisa said...

Amanda, you read my mind!!

Well, since I am co-owner of this h00r house, I'm going to be greedy and take 50 and 51.

50: Edward (aka Fifty)
51: Jasper

You knew I'd go "there."

Jaymes805 said...

I mean 24. Im smart.

fanficzombie said...

#25 bloated

TwiKiwi50 said...

#25 slippery

Demanda said...

LISA!!! LISA!! :( :( :( Come on!!!! You KNOW what you have to say!

Twired Jen said...

26. pulsating

17foreverlisa said...

KA-CHING!

fanficzombie said...

#28 ripped panties

TwiKiwi50 said...

27. Cum guzzling son of a bitch

Ooh that felt good

Jaymes805 said...

Awww lisa, no Mike Newton?!?!

My After Car Is An XKR said...

Dang it I'm missing big chunks of this. Mr. XKR came home and I had to go chat with him. 100% focused on DML now!

fanficzombie said...

nice one twi kiwi!!!

17foreverlisa said...

*waves at Sharon*

VampiresWeLove said...

@Kiwi LOL..you're like the chick on Deuce Bigalow ;)

fanficzombie said...

#29 cucumber

Jaymes805 said...

No idea how this story turned into a story of our vaginas but it did.

17foreverlisa said...

Not in my world, Amanda. LOL!!!!! But I should have done it for you. *hangs head in shame*

TheRugbymom said...

30 robot timberwolf

My After Car Is An XKR said...

Damn it I couldn't figure out which one Renesmo was supposed to be! Is s/he a celebrity? Sorry. Fail on my part.

Jaymes805 said...

Wow cucumber... you're a mind reader!

Twired Jen said...

30. West Hollywood

Dangrdafne said...

*waves at Lisa*

Demanda said...

I still love you long time Lisa :)

17foreverlisa said...

robot timberwolf? PMSL!!!

TwiKiwi50 said...

Why thank you. I aim to please.

#30 Brownie (like, the small children I've been hanging with all day, not the baked chocolate goodness)

Twired Jen said...

Hey Sharon!

My After Car Is An XKR said...

31. bloated

As in, my stomach

Jaymes805 said...

Haha I totally thought Jen pulled out Robot Timberwolf. #100monkeyssong

fanficzombie said...

#30 ass gasket

TwiKiwi50 said...

I missed how vaginas are involved here. In which case, I plead that #29 or #38 be CATFISH.

My After Car Is An XKR said...

@Amy LMAO at your "insulting term" and followup comment. Love it!

Demanda said...

Jess we already have bloated :(
What about something else?

Twired Jen said...

Sorry just have to say this....
SOOOO EXCITED KSTEW HAS BEEN CONFIRMED TO PLAY SNOW WHITE!

17foreverlisa said...

Can you see me, Sharon? LOL! Sorry. I couldn't resist. (((HUG)))

Thank you, Amanda. Mwah!

Son just got home from work and is ready to eat supper, dog wants to go outside. Don't they Friday's are all about me?!

Be back in a few...

fanficzombie said...

@twi kiwi -- i am hiding from the Brownies...i have two boxes of GS cookies on my ass right now!!

VampiresWeLove said...

No other casting being thrown around?

Twired Jen said...

31. salty

Demanda said...

@ Jen - WHAT REALLY??!?!?!?!?!?!

Twired Jen said...

@VampiresWeLove Nope.

fanficzombie said...

#32 fishy

17foreverlisa said...

Sorry just have to say this....
SOOOO EXCITED ROBSTEN LIVES!!!!!

My After Car Is An XKR said...

Whoops. Uhhh I can't think. 32. Tight.

Twired Jen said...

@Manda -YUP!

Jaymes805 said...

You peeps are rocking my socks. If I was wearing any.

Edward said...

I would just like to let you all know that LwE is no longer coherent and is in the stages of passing out. If you need to tell her anything I will mediate.

17foreverlisa said...

Going to subscribe to comments and see if I can access it better from my cell phone.

My After Car Is An XKR said...

@Jen - REALLY? That's awesome!!
@Lisa - are there new Robsten pictures?

Demanda said...

Holla! That's totes amazing. Ugh I love her.

Jaymes805 said...

Tight is now 33, we're on 34

Demanda said...

Awh Edward you are very kind. . .

TwiKiwi50 said...

I just tweeted a pic of how hot I am right now, drinking in my uniform #NAUGHTY!

Oh yeah, DML:

#33 Ribbed

My After Car Is An XKR said...

34. Ass cheeks

TwiKiwi50 said...

@Edward - ever the gentleman!

Don't you take advantage of LwE. Hopefully Derek will protect her.

#34 pinky finger

fanficzombie said...

#35 elongated

Twired Jen said...

@twikiwi- Just tweeted you back with a pic of me!

TwiKiwi50 said...

@Jen - saw that!

I say everyone should tweet a pic of themselves playing DML. I'll go again....

Living with Edward said...

Yes yes, I'm so wonderful, I know.

And why would you think I would do anything to take advantage of LwE? I happen to enjoy having my head attatched to my neck. And Derek would throw LwE to lions if there was some cheese in it for him. You can't trust dogs. That's what I told Jaymes805.

My After Car Is An XKR said...

I took one of myself to tweet. Phone hasn't wanted to upload pics in a while though. Will do my best.

Jaymes805 said...

Haha yes, tweeted pics of DML= awesome idea

Twired Jen said...

36. freeway

TwiKiwi50 said...

@Edward - umm, I'm a massive Team Derek fan after what you did to him. #purpke

#36 turgid

darcydalesio said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
VampiresWeLove said...

#37 Bukakied

blue_darcy77 said...

#38 Whiskey

fanficzombie said...

ok..i posted shitty pic on twitter...

TwiKiwi50 said...

Another pic tweeted :-)

#39 FUCKED (interpret how you will)

Edward said...

You may not be team Derek if you knew him very well. Don't let that cute fluffy persona fool you. All he cares about is himself and cheese. He needs therapy.

Jaymes805 said...

Hahahha dude not gonna lie, my DML tweet pic is boring.

Twired Jen said...

40. groping

I think tonight is going to be one of those nights.....I may tweet a pic sans make up after I take a shower...ooh, aaahhh.

Demanda said...

Oh wow. I might have just broken my toe standing up.. LOL oooouuuch

Jaymes805 said...

Vampsweluv did you mean buknaked? Or did you mean what you wrote?

TheRugbymom said...

41 alligators!

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