Pixie Dust and Cheerleading

So - it's no secret that I have a bit of enthusiasm and tend to enjoy DML way too much. I have even been accused of being a cheerleader...


Maybe THIS kind of cheerleader.

As well as possessing the ability to sprinkle pixie dust.



So where does all this leave us? Well - it lead you HERE! For one more week of DML debauchery. So - let's do this!

As with my first time hosting, I'll be giving a hint for each of the two. Let the madness begin!

Mad Lib #1

Hint: The vampires come out at night!

1. Plural Noun

2. Verb ending in "ing"

3. Noun

4. Noun

5. Plural Noun

6. Part of Body

7. Noun

8. Verb ending in "ing"

9. Part of the Body (Plural)

10. Verb ending in "ing"

11. Noun

12. Noun

13. Part of the Body

14. Adverb
15. Part of the Body (Plural)

Afraid of the Dark

I was home alone and scared out of my boobs. I could hear the wind humping, and off in the distance a taint was howling. I crossed the room, locked the jizz, and climbed into bed pulling the butt plugs over my ballsack. Then it happened. I could hear a disco pole sucking up the stairs. My clits started to chatter and my knees began cockblocking. The flogger was thrust open and there was a huge Uma Thurman's nostril with hair all over its swollen nipples. It was my father. "Hi, we're home," he said greedily. "Hope you weren't afraid of staying home alone." "No," I said, lying through my Robert Pattinson's balls.

Mad Lib #2

Hint: What Edward may sing to Ren- ugh! I can't even type it!!!

1. Adjective

2. Part of the Body (Plural)

3. Part of the Body (Plural)

4. Adjective

5. Noun

6. Verb

7. Type of Liquid

8. Noun

9. Verb Ending in "ing"

10. Noun

11. Adjective

12. Adjective

13. Plural Noun

14. Plural Noun

15. Noun

16. Verb (Past Tense)

17. Part of the Body (Plural)

18. Adjective

19. Verb

20. Noun

21. Adjective

Nursery Rhymes

When some creepy school students were asked what nursery rhymes popped into their crooked cocks or were on the tip of their elbows, these were their enormous answers:

Jack and Jill went up the vagina to fart a pail of semen. Jack fell down and broke his pocket pussy and Jill came skull-fucking after.

Mary, Mary, quite contrary, how does your beefy meat grow? With slippery bells and succulent shells and throbbing veins all in a row.

Three blind dripping taints, see how they run. They all went after the riding crop's wife, who fucked off their scrotal cacks with an inebriated knife. Did you ever slurp such a burp in your life as three cradling mice.

MiniE Starts DML Off Right!

WELCOME!!! Tonight we are kicking off a new revolution in DML! It's dirtier, drunker, and drenched in debauchery! I am your host for the evening, StarlitViolets, from:

***Violet Delights***

I'd also like to introduce my partners in crime and their home blogs:

DangrDafne Days of Delirium - hosted by our one and only DangrDafne

17 forever - hosted by the lovely 17foreverlisa

*And, of course - the original home of DML and its Queen*

Twilight SagaPalooza - hosted by none other than mmMoxie

The four of us will be taking turns hosting, so you get a little variety in your weekly dose of DML! This week though - you're stuck with me! I may have my own style, but we'll pretty much stick to mmMoxie's formula that has grown DML into a regular Friday night lush lounge!

So pick up a drink or two, set Twitter aside, and toss in your two cents, or more if you want to! And if you've been a lurker and always wanted to play DML - this is your shot! Just jump in and give us a few of your dirtiest.

When I found out I was going to be hosting, I knew I needed some help and LOTS of Mad Libs! So MiniE and I took a little trip to Barnes & Noble. And here's what we ended up with...

I finally got the Mad Libs away from MiniE by bribing him...

...with a little Bree Tanner action... He's such a perv!

Since we've somehow inexplicably been able to relate Twilight to EVERYTHING, I figured I should do the same for DML - so - I'll be giving a convoluted "hint" each time I host that is both the reason I picked it and a small clue as to what we're dealing with tonight. LET'S DO THIS!!!

Mad Lib #1

Hint: Dirty Pirate Hookers From Whore Island!

1. Noun

2. Adjective

3. Verb

4. Adverb

5. Noun

6. Adjective

7. Plural Noun

8. Plural Noun

9. Plural Noun

10. Part of the Body

11. Noun

12. Noun

13. Noun

14. Noun

15. Part of the Body

***

If you haven't already, read the directions up top and leave your answers in the comments. I'll post it soon after we finish. We MAY even do two... If the first is DIRTY enough.

Talk Like a Pirate

Ye can always pretend to be a bloodthirsty Robowski, threatening everyone by waving yer gangly sword in the air, but until ye learn to suck like a pirate, ye'll never be seductively accepted as an authentic greasy taint. So here's what ye do: Cleverly work into yer daily conversations putrid pirate phrases such as "Ahoy there, boobs," "Avast, ye butt pirates," and "Shiver me scrotums." Remember to drop all yer gs when ye say such words as sailin', spittin', and fightin'. This will give ye a/an Sparkle Peen start to being recognized as a swashbucklin' cock holster. Once ye have the lingo down pat, it helps to wear a three-cornered clit hood on yer head, stash a/an cum bubble in your pants, and keep a/an peg-legged dildo perched atop your GUNT. Aye, now ye be a real pirate (hooker)!

Mad Lib #2