Directions

*Pour yourself a glass or four.

*Type ONE ANSWER per comment.

*Write the number, type of word, and your word (i.e. #1 Noun: labia).

*Make it DIRTY.

*Make it CRUDE.

*Make it Twilight-related. (semi-optional)

*Make one of the words “taint." It's a must. The word "taint" is funny ALL THE TIME.

*Oh yeah, I know we'll be a tad bit tipsy, but try to read the other comments,
so we know what number we're on and don't have any repeats.

-Mox

Friday, June 11, 2010

MiniE Starts DML Off Right!

WELCOME!!! Tonight we are kicking off a new revolution in DML! It's dirtier, drunker, and drenched in debauchery! I am your host for the evening, StarlitViolets, from:



I'd also like to introduce my partners in crime and their home blogs:

DangrDafne Days of Delirium - hosted by our one and only DangrDafne

17 forever - hosted by the lovely 17foreverlisa


*And, of course - the original home of DML and its Queen*
Twilight SagaPalooza - hosted by none other than mmMoxie



The four of us will be taking turns hosting, so you get a little variety in your weekly dose of DML! This week though - you're stuck with me! I may have my own style, but we'll pretty much stick to mmMoxie's formula that has grown DML into a regular Friday night lush lounge!



So pick up a drink or two, set Twitter aside, and toss in your two cents, or more if you want to! And if you've been a lurker and always wanted to play DML - this is your shot! Just jump in and give us a few of your dirtiest.


When I found out I was going to be hosting, I knew I needed some help and LOTS of Mad Libs! So MiniE and I took a little trip to Barnes & Noble. And here's what we ended up with...






I finally got the Mad Libs away from MiniE by bribing him...

...with a little Bree Tanner action... He's such a perv!

Since we've somehow inexplicably been able to relate Twilight to EVERYTHING, I figured I should do the same for DML - so - I'll be giving a convoluted "hint" each time I host that is both the reason I picked it and a small clue as to what we're dealing with tonight. LET'S DO THIS!!!



Mad Lib #1
Hint: Dirty Pirate Hookers From Whore Island!

1. Noun

2. Adjective

3. Verb

4. Adverb

5. Noun

6. Adjective

7. Plural Noun

8. Plural Noun

9. Plural Noun

10. Part of the Body

11. Noun

12. Noun

13. Noun

14. Noun

15. Part of the Body
***

If you haven't already, read the directions up top and leave your answers in the comments. I'll post it soon after we finish. We MAY even do two... If the first is DIRTY enough.



Talk Like a Pirate

Ye can always pretend to be a bloodthirsty Robowski, threatening everyone by waving yer gangly sword in the air, but until ye learn to suck like a pirate, ye'll never be seductively accepted as an authentic greasy taint. So here's what ye do: Cleverly work into yer daily conversations putrid pirate phrases such as "Ahoy there, boobs," "Avast, ye butt pirates," and "Shiver me scrotums." Remember to drop all yer gs when ye say such words as sailin', spittin', and fightin'. This will give ye a/an Sparkle Peen start to being recognized as a swashbucklin' cock holster. Once ye have the lingo down pat, it helps to wear a three-cornered clit hood on yer head, stash a/an cum bubble in your pants, and keep a/an peg-legged dildo perched atop your GUNT. Aye, now ye be a real pirate (hooker)!







Mad Lib #2


Hint: Emmett's Irritable Grizzlies


1. Adjective


2. Noun


3. Plural Noun


4. Adjective


5. Adjective


6. Verb ending in "-ing"


7. Verb ending in "-ing"


8. Adjective


9. Adjective


10. Noun


11. Type of Food (plural)


12. Part of the Body (plural)


13. Adjective


14. Vehicle


15. Type of Food (plural)


16. Type of Food (plural)


17. Something Alive (plural)


18. Something Alive (plural)


19. Adverb


20. Noun





Bears

If you go to some moist place like Yellowstone National grizzly taint, you must know how to deal with wild animals such as bears and wolves and bloody poons. The most important of these is the bear. There are three kinds of bears at Yellowstone: the grizzly bear, the cum-riddled bear, and the horny bear. Bears spend most of thier time wanking or claw-fisting. They look very fuzzy, but if you make them twitchy, they might bite your Emmett's cock. Bears will come up to your car and beg for cumquats. They will stand on their hind legs and clap their taints together and pretend to be thirsy. But do not get out of your Stretch Vulva or offer the bears jizz-covered semen or footlongs. This same adivce applies to other wild creatures such as grizzly bears and ass worms. Remember all these rules and you will spend your vacation thrustily and not get eaten by a cum-dumpster.

233 comments:

1 – 200 of 233   Newer›   Newest»
17foreverlisa said...

1 Noun Robowski

17foreverlisa said...

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!

17foreverlisa said...

Hi, Amy!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Hello Lisa. Damn you!

fanficzombie said...

Yeah, I am here!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

2) gangly

mmMoxie said...

#2 skanky

StarlitViolets said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
17foreverlisa said...

Oops! *off

mmMoxie said...

fuckity fuck fuck! Now I know how frustrating it is when your computer is slow.

fanficzombie said...

#3 sucking

StarlitViolets said...

You're all HERE!!! MWAH!!!

Twired Jen said...

#3 verb: cockriding

StarlitViolets said...

@ffzombie - can it be "suck?"

17foreverlisa said...

Totally deleted that last comment. Too many typos.

Hey, Mox! You made it. Hi, Mrs. P :)

17foreverlisa said...

Hi, Jen!

Dangrdafne said...

Of course I get here for adverb - This is JUST how my Friday is going!!!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

4) seductively

mmMoxie said...

#4 promiscuously

mmMoxie said...

FUCK!

Twired Jen said...

hey u....*muah!* lisa! Gotta go check on my chicken lmao!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

That's right...I took the adverb.

StarlitViolets said...

LOL! Daf you crack me up! Just think -ly.

fanficzombie said...

it can be whatever you want it to be...take Twired Jen's if it works better.

mmMoxie said...

#5 greasy taint

Dangrdafne said...

I think -ly all the time and still NOTHING!!!!

Twired Jen said...

#5 infected cunt

17foreverlisa said...

ffzombie, good to "see" you back!

fanficzombie said...

#6 greasy

mmMoxie said...

FF and I are thinking greasy

Cullenary Curser said...

#7 boobs

StarlitViolets said...

@ffz - Can't use greasy cuz the last one was greasy taint.

fanficzombie said...

thanks Lisa. It is good to be back. It's my big FU to RL!!

Twired Jen said...

#6 adj: putrid (like as in smells bad?)

StarlitViolets said...

Still need #6...

fanficzombie said...

#6 revised...moist

mmMoxie said...

#8 butt pirates

17foreverlisa said...

I hear ya, ffz. RL has been kicking my ass, too.

@CC - You never write. You never call. (((hug)))

17foreverlisa said...

#7 plural noun - me and Mrs. P (we got a thing goin' on)

Twired Jen said...

#7 scrotum's (plural noun)

fanficzombie said...

shoot...mr. z just brought me a sandwich...brb

StarlitViolets said...

@Jen - I'll use that for #9.

We need #10 now.

Twired Jen said...

#8 Kristen Stewart's (plural noun right?)

mmMoxie said...

what # are we on? I did #8 then i saw a bunch of #7s

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

10) sparklepeen

17foreverlisa said...

SV, you can use Jen's #7 instead of mine if you want. I was just kidding around ;)

Twired Jen said...

#10 Ass rim

mmMoxie said...

#10 big fat cock

17foreverlisa said...

LMAO! So how is it not being in control, Mox??

mmMoxie said...

wow...i'm super dooper slow

mmMoxie said...

#11 cock holster

Twilove1 said...

I still need to log in and figure out which number you're on, but just wanted to say hi first!!

mmMoxie said...

@Lisa - to be honest...it's really fucking hard! I'm not used to this LOL

Dangrdafne said...

@Twired Jen - no Kristen Stewart's is not a plural noun - silly girl but you will get to see her tomorrow!

fanficzombie said...

@mmMoxie...no drinking or smoking makes you slow on the uptake...

Twired Jen said...

#11 Clit hood

Dangrdafne said...

@Mox - but fun right???

mmMoxie said...

@FF - no shit!

17foreverlisa said...

Hi, TW1!!! Are you ready for tomorrow?

StarlitViolets said...

If anyone cares - I'm having a FUCKING blast!!!

Dangrdafne said...

#12 someone requested cum bubble at some point when they said they wouldn't be here.

Dangrdafne said...

@SV I care and you are doing an awesome job!!

Twilove1 said...

12. Wanking Dwarf

mmMoxie said...

@DD - I'm trying to acclimate myself. It's all kind of frantic and I'm a little scared. HOLD ME

fanficzombie said...

#13 ripped condom

StarlitViolets said...

#12 is cum bubble for Daf's "friend."

17foreverlisa said...

Geez, DD! I thought maybe you had left for Boston. Make it through your work day okay?

Dangrdafne said...

{{{{MOX}}}}}

StarlitViolets said...

Wait - sorry - #13 is cum bubble! We now need a #14.

17foreverlisa said...

Oh, shit! How did you like TW1's Wanking Dwarf, Mox? Need to change your panties?

Twilove1 said...

Hi Lisa! yep, I'm super excited about tomorrow. I still have to figure out how to use the camera, pack, and do about a million other things so my family will survive while I'm gone all weekend.

mmMoxie said...

LOL thanks DD

#13 peg leg dildo

Dangrdafne said...

@ Lisa - I actually did not make it through my day ok but it is all done now so blech on that.

mmMoxie said...

#14 peg leg dildo

Twired Jen said...

@Dandrdafne..oops...yah i mean there aren't 2 kristen stewarts..LMAO!!!!!

#13 Sparkly Cum

StarlitViolets said...

Now we just need #15.

17foreverlisa said...

Awwww, DD. I figured it was a bad day when I didn't get an e-mail from you or see you around the group chat.

mmMoxie said...

@Lisa - anything Dwarf makes me have to change my panties.

Twired Jen said...

#15 GUNT!!! (is it her gut or her cunt?)

Twilove1 said...

I love it that we're such over achievers that our nouns come with adjectives already attached

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Omg...peg leg dildo is the funniest thing ever...so pirate hooker-ish lol!

StarlitViolets said...

LMFAO @ GUNT!!!!!

K - do we want one more???

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Twired jen! Clit hood AND gunt!?!?!?! LMAO!!!

mmMoxie said...

WOOT! SLV's first ever DML

Congratulations! You made it

Ginny said...

Holy hell this moves fast
and my computer is so slow tonight!
I'm just going to continue to lurk ~
but you all rock!

VampiresWeLove said...

I'm such a dumbass-I kept refreshing the other page..and ya'll are over here LOL..fuck me..just got ma first computer #stupidnoob

#15 Edward's sweaty ballsack

since I missed everything LOL

17foreverlisa said...

Ok. Is it me, or is it a LONG way to scroll up to see what number we're on? Is the format not working? I'm open to suggestions.

mmMoxie said...

@Lisa - we need to change the comment form to a box. You're right.

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

I suggest the pop up comment box. You can overlap it over the mad lib numbers.

17foreverlisa said...

@Ginny - Yes, it does. We're a competitive bunch. LOL! Welcome.

@VWL - You are going to fit right in with this group. LMAO!

fanficzombie said...

it is a big fat pain...you can open up two windows tho and keep the list up on one and comment on the other.

But I do prefer the other format with the comment box separate

Porphyrias_Curse said...

Is it too late, can I play???

mmMoxie said...

@Lisa i think you're the only one that can modify the format

17foreverlisa said...

@Mox & Mrs. P - Agreed!! I never really paid any attention to how it would be, I guess. I just wanted to make sure we didn't have to answer the "Edit" question, etc.

Dangrdafne said...

Pop up box PLEASE! I thought maybe it was just me.

StarlitViolets - may we have another please??

VampiresWeLove said...

Oh-and I so rudely didn't say hai to all you drunk bitchez *Kstew double finger salute* Lubs ya!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

@PCurse...hello!!!!!! I think they are about to load up another one...

Porphyrias_Curse said...

YAY!!! gettin another drink...

mmMoxie said...

Damn. I need a drink after that

Dangrdafne said...

@ Porphyrias_Curse - I have requested a second mad lib - we shall see what our hostess with the mostess will do - but I am pretty sure she will post a second one *crossing fingers*.

@ all - thank you to all for showing up on our new little blog here. It is wonderful to see so many familiar faces and even more wonderful to see so many NEW faces. Thank you!!

VampiresWeLove said...

I got my Malibu & Sunny D..sounds really fuckin classy huh? I will afford quality liquor when these little teacup humans stop bein so fuckin needy ;-)

Porphyrias_Curse said...

Sometimes, peer pressure is awesome.

StarlitViolets said...

Okay - the first is posted and the second one is up!

VampiresWeLove said...

#3 bloody poons

mmMoxie said...

OMG! #1 is fucking hilarious!

VampiresWeLove said...

buahahaha..I'm so retarded lol..wheres the box?

17foreverlisa said...

Congrats, SV! Great job. Carry on, kids. I need to get back to my family birthday party. MWAH!!

StarlitViolets said...

On MAD LIB 2 - We still need a #1 and #2.

mmMoxie said...

#1 pointy

Porphyrias_Curse said...

#1)Adj- moist

Dangrdafne said...

@ SV - #1 couldn't be better. That was AWESOME!!! Great way to start the new blog!

VampiresWeLove said...

#2 Grizzly Taint

17foreverlisa said...

Mad Lib #1 is awesome!

...keep a peg-legged dildo perched atop your GUNT.

Where else would you perch it. LMAO!

Night!

StarlitViolets said...

Thanks ladies!!! I LOVED that you all went with my hint idea!

I'm just enjoying the whole thing! MWAH!

StarlitViolets said...

We need a #4 now.

Porphyrias_Curse said...

4)adj: cum riddled

mmMoxie said...

#4 fishy

VampiresWeLove said...

#5 Claw Fisting

StarlitViolets said...

Welcome Porphyrias_Curse!!! Sorry I did't say hi earlier!

Nice #4!

Dangrdafne said...

@ all sorry that there is no comment box tonite. It is on the list of things to adjust for next time :) Hope we can deal for one night :) If you think of anything else we need to do or you would like to see (within reason of course LOL), please let us know. Thank you from the Bar Maid.

Twilove1 said...

6. wanking

Porphyrias_Curse said...

ty :) HI (waves) nice to be here

VampiresWeLove said...

oops that would be #6 or 7 Claw Fisting LOL

StarlitViolets said...

VampiresWeLove - Hi babe! Good to see you!

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Omg...mad libs number one has the best use of a lit hood, peg legged dildo and a gunt that I have ever seen...lolol!

StarlitViolets said...

I still need a #5.

StarlitViolets said...

#5 then #8.

VampiresWeLove said...

Hey Starlit-and FYI I love your new blog layout-3 columns looks awesome!

mmMoxie said...

#5 horney

StarlitViolets said...

@VWL - THANKS!!! I was proud and then today Blogger fucked with my mind by providing a "Design" feature! WTF?!

Raitz said...

just got home... what did i miss?!!?

Porphyrias_Curse said...

7)verb with ing- anally training

mmMoxie said...

@Raitz - welcome! we're on the second DML. #6 I think

Dangrdafne said...

@ Raitz - HELLOOOOO!!!!

StarlitViolets said...

@Raitz - WELCOME!!! We're on #8 and we'll be putting the comments in a box for next time... And a FUCKING funny ass 1st Mad Lib.

Raitz said...

#6 glistening

StarlitViolets said...

I need #8 now and then in order from there.

mmMoxie said...

Jesus am I off tonight. I blame it on the lack of a-a-a-a alcohol

Raitz said...

imma scrolling fiend!! date nite is on pause for dml... lol

Dangrdafne said...

#8 Fuzzy

VampiresWeLove said...

#8 Cum-infused

Porphyrias_Curse said...

#9)adj-twitchy

mmMoxie said...

LMAO @ twitchy

StarlitViolets said...

Think DIRTY girls!!!

VampiresWeLove said...

#10 Emmett's cock

Raitz said...

#11 cumquats... (tee hee)

Dangrdafne said...

#11 Beef Patties

mmMoxie said...

#10 hairy bear balls

mmMoxie said...

grrrrr!

VampiresWeLove said...

LOL @ cumquats

Dangrdafne said...

@ Raitz I was actually trying to get #11 for you LMAO!!!!

Dangrdafne said...

Mox is really living up to the hint on this Mad Lib tonite LOL!!!

Raitz said...

i love cumquats on my beef patties... mmm!

mmMoxie said...

what # are we on?

VampiresWeLove said...

12

Porphyrias_Curse said...

that sounds sooooooo dirty. I like it!

mmMoxie said...

I am a rule follower

Dangrdafne said...

Hint: Emmett's Irritable Grizzlies

#12

mmMoxie said...

#12 taint

Dangrdafne said...

Perfect Mox!!!

StarlitViolets said...

I'm at #13.

Raitz said...

PMSL moxie :)

StarlitViolets said...

Nope - Daf was right! Sorry - NOW I need a #13.

mmMoxie said...

come on guys. this is a LONG one (that's what she said)

Twilove1 said...

13. thirsty

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Hey Raitz and VWL!

VampiresWeLove said...

14 Stretch Vulva LOL Volvo

Porphyrias_Curse said...

#13)adj- sparkly

Dangrdafne said...

14. Jeep

VampiresWeLove said...

Hey Mrs P :-) *hugz*

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Hey twilove01!!!

StarlitViolets said...

Thanks Twilove1!!!

You guys are slowing down. Too much drinky?

mmMoxie said...

#15 jizz covered semen.

Dangrdafne said...

@ VampiresWeLove - LMAO!!!! That is hilarious. Funny and TRUE story - that is how my Dad always pronounced Volvo - NOT KIDDING!!! He had a severe hearing problem and didn't know how to say it, even after telling him time after time. It was pretty funny.

Twilove1 said...

Hi Mrs P!!

Porphyrias_Curse said...

#16)food - Rob Cock

Raitz said...

16. footlongs

hey mrsP!!!!

StarlitViolets said...

@Mox - for FOOD?

VampiresWeLove said...

lmao #15..THAT's what I should be drinking!!

mmMoxie said...

@SLV - yes for food. It is a delicacy in some cultures.

VampiresWeLove said...

*snicker* Starlit..like you wouldn't gobble that shit down inna minute!!

Elusive S @ Twired said...

Alright girls... I think I get it. I'm in for the 730 start :D

xo
S

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Of course it's food SV. Geez. LMAO!

StarlitViolets said...

LMFAO! Yes - but I'm a DIRTY WHORE!!!

VampiresWeLove said...

Precisely..continue

Porphyrias_Curse said...

ok, if you don't count jizz covered semen as a food, you could call it jizz covered semen-in a cup!

Dangrdafne said...

17. Grizzly Bears

mmMoxie said...

#17 ass worms

mmMoxie said...

#18 ass worms

VampiresWeLove said...

Fucked up Eclipse wigs 17

Porphyrias_Curse said...

#18) plural something alive - not bears, aka werewolves

VampiresWeLove said...

buahaha..ewwww

StarlitViolets said...

@Mox - Ew!

Two more, girls!!!

Elusive S @ Twired said...

19 adverb DRIPPING

Porphyrias_Curse said...

19)adv- thrustily(?) its a word right

VampiresWeLove said...

20 Cum-Dumpster *starlit* giggle

Twilove1 said...

19 slippery

VampiresWeLove said...

Thrustily is a fuckawesome word! *fuck webster*

Twilove1 said...

whoops, sorry. I'm so slow at refreshing and scrolling that I missed the finish (that's what she said?)

Dangrdafne said...

200 comments!!! woot woot!!

You all ROCK!!!!

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